I took Richard’s arm and Lizzie took Gervase’s when he offered it. “Is it always like this?” Richard murmured to me, bewilderment and amusement mingling in his voice.

I smiled up at him. “No, sometimes we’re late. This is restrained compared to usual. They’re being good because you’re here.”

He smiled broadly and turned to Gervase. “Could you see our mother putting up with this for long?”

Gervase responded with a grin that matched his brother’s. “She would have the headache instantly.”

“Our last day of mourning,” Lizzie reminded me.

I had grown so used to seeing the subdued greys and blacks I’d forgotten how we must all appear, but next to Richard’s scarlet cloth coat, our dowdiness became explicit. Gervase, in a soft brown, blended in with us, but Richard stood out without effort, perhaps without noticing—but I doubted it. “I’m glad this is ending. This is a travesty of when I really mourned before. I might throw my mourning gowns away and start again if and when I need them.”

“You’d be well advised to,” Richard said. “I don’t mean to disparage you, my love, but whoever made these gowns for you did you no favours. They seem to have been made for somebody else.”

“They were. Martha bought them in York readymade, and they were altered by a maid for me. I have some new gowns, and I shall wear one tomorrow. For you.”

“I shall look forward to it.” He smiled again and leant closer. “If it wasn’t the Sabbath, I’d make a totally scandalous suggestion I have every intention of carrying out in the near future.” I flushed, and he laughed and took me out to the carriage.

I felt foolish travelling down the high street of Darkwater village in such style, amongst the villagers who knew me so well, but I stuck it out and when we reached the old church at the end of the street, events were almost normal. I tried to forget Richard’s murmured words to me.

I burned for him. I thought of that time at Hareton almost constantly now our wedding grew closer. I wanted him so much sleeping had become a problem for me, and now he slept only a few doors away from mine, the urge grew worse. Not the thoughts our vicar would encourage, but I was always honest with myself, and I knew the few weeks until our wedding would be the longest I ever experienced. I wasn’t used to this intensity of yearning, and I had no idea that one experience of lovemaking would lead to this longing, until touching him blew me apart.

Richard and Gervase were used to stares, so they took no notice of the congregation, but once we were ensconced in our high-sided pew nobody but the Reverend Mr. Claverton from his high perch in the pulpit could see us.

James dozed as usual and the children behaved like little angels for a change. Even Ruth stopped scowling. The service continued on its soothing way, the familiar litanies and responses passed without pause and I let myself dream of what was to come, trying to keep my mind away from the more physical aspect of our relationship. I’m not sure what the sermon was about, but it wasn’t long, only half an hour or so. I itched and burned with desire and shame, sitting next to the man I loved, feeling his presence.

We led the congregation out, and spent some time accepting felicitations from people. Richard was gracious, I tried to follow suit.

Afterwards we stopped to speak to the vicar. Mr. Claverton had the pleasure of Steven’s assistance last year, and after the usual courtesies, Richard asked him about it. “Do you miss Drury’s services?”

“Frankly, my lord, not at all,” Mr. Claverton said. “I hardly knew he was gone. I did have my doubts before, but once he left, I realised how little he attended to church affairs.”

“So you would oppose any attempts he might make to enter the church again?” Richard’s voice was soft, but his gaze steady and firm. There was nothing of the society man, or the libertine about him today.

Mr. Claverton studied him carefully, his clever eyes assessing. “I do not think he would be suitable for church office, sir, especially in the light of recent events.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Richard agreed promptly. “I keep him under observation, and if he makes a move in that direction, I’ll let you know. If he asks you for any favours, please contact me, and I’ll deal with it if you wish.”

“Thank you, my lord,” said Mr. Claverton.

It was the first I had heard of it, that Richard was having Steven watched.

“You mean he might try to continue his career in the church?” Knowing what I did about Steven, the thought appalled me. Not all churchmen were suitable for the office they occupied, but if I stood by and let Steven Drury apply for a bishopric, I would be the worst kind of villain. The one who stood back and did nothing.

I’d hoped Steven was out of our lives, but if Julia Drury’s father had allowed her back into his affections, it gave Steven a way back to society. Unconsciously I moved closer to Richard. He put his free hand over mine. “You know some bishops and other churchmen?”

“We have a clutch of ‘em in the family,” Richard replied, his voice firm. “I’ll certainly write to them.”

“Steven has a vicious nature.” My voice wasn’t entirely steady, and Mr. Claverton turned a curious gaze on to me.

Richard pressed my hand and released it. “He will not approach you.” I believed him.

Martha